Hello, darling
by DaiHelsing
Summary: Arthur's online in the USA, Eames's online in Germany and they have an interesting conversation. About laying, chocolate, knowing each other and so on. The finale of the chat will be unexpected... ArthurEames. R&R! Oneshot.


Arthur sits in a cafeteria and sips his latte. He's working on a project for Cobb. His notebook is plugged and charging. He's writing and listening to Mozart with his Skullcandy headphones: too big, black and white with the skull logo, kitschy and fancy. He bought them few months ago because they don't fit his style, not at all and he likes the idea. Eames would laugh at these headphones.

He reads a passage from Freud's book about subconsciousness and takes notes. He's typing for a minute or longer, his fingers quick and quiet. Suddenly there is a short sound and _Mr8AndHalfInches is sending you a message. _He opens the messenger and there is:

_Mr8AndHalfInches (__9:31 AM): hello, darling_

Arthur smiles slightly.

_PointMan2Rent__ (9:31 AM): eames._

_Mr8AndHalfInches (9:31 AM): how do you know it's me?_ comes instantly.

_PointMan2Rent (9:31 AM): nobody else calls me so. _

He sips his coffee.

_Mr8AndHalfInches (9:31 AM): your mum?_

_PointMan2Rent (9:31 AM): she uses my NAME. she named me so to __actually USE my name. _

_Mr8AndHalfInches (9:32 AM): no honey-bunny?_

_PointMan2Rent (9:32 AM): no. _

_Mr8AndHalfInches (9:32 AM): my dear lil' Arthur, how are u?_

_PointMan2Rent (9:32 AM): okay. _

_Mr8AndHalfInches (9:32 AM): it's half past 9, Sat and you're online. you students don't party nowadays?_

_PointMan2Rent (9:32 AM): we do. but I have work to do._

_Mr8AndHalfInches (9:32 AM): for Cobb?_

_PointMan2Rent (9:32 AM): yea. _

_Mr8AndHalfInches (9:33 AM): sth interesting?_

_PointMan2Rent (9:3__3 AM): well, quite. _

_Mr8AndHalfInches (9:33 AM): so good luck with that, darling~;)_

_PointMan2Rent (9:3__3 AM): where r u?_

_Mr8AndHalfInches (9:3__3 AM): Berlin. working for our dear cobb_

Arthur glances to the book and quickly reads a passage.

_Mr8AndHalfInches (9:3__3 AM): do you miss me, darling?_

Arthur stares at the question. He hasn't seen Eames for almost a month.

_PointMan2Rent (9:3__3 AM): what kind of question is that? _he types after a pause.

_Mr8AndHalfInches (9:3__3 AM): a rhetorical one, but I want u to answer;)_

Arthur hesitates.

_Mr8AndHalfInches (9:3__3 AM): ?_

_Mr8AndHalfInches (9:3__3 AM): c'mon, darling. yes or no? we ain't see each other soon so whatever you write gonna be forgotten when we meet. I shall delete my archive. c'mon, make my day. _

Arthur rolls his eyes and writes:

_PointMan2Rent (9:3__4 AM): I miss you. _

His fingers slightly trembling.

_Mr8AndHalfInches (9:3__4 AM): I thought so, darling~ and what part of me you miss the most?_

_PointMan2Rent (9:34__ AM): you being weird. _

_Mr8AndHalfInches (9:3__4 AM): always. so gonna tell me?_

_PointMan2Rent (9:3__4 AM): lemme think…_

Arthur decides to play Eames' game. They are far away from each other, ain't they? Next time they meet, it will be normal like always. This conversation is a joke, isn't it?

_Mr8AndHalfInches (9:3__4 AM): Sooo?_

_PointMan2Rent (9:34 AM):__ the way you make me angry, the way you tease me. _

_Mr8AndHalfInches (9:3__4 AM): ooh, really? u like me rubbing you the wrong way?_

_PointMan2Rent (9:3__4 AM): I do _Arthur writes quickly. He does.

_Mr8AndHalfInches (9:3__4 AM): uh-huh. and I like the way you get angry. u r funny then._

_PointMan2Rent (9:3__4 AM): am I? :[_

_Mr8AndHalfInches (9:3__5 AM): yes! you look more serious and older then. but still funny. and cute. _

_PointMan2Rent (9:3__5 AM): cute?..._

Arthur raises his brow.

_Mr8AndHalfInches (9:3__5 AM): yep. like a border collie puppy. _

He googles the breed and goes through pictures and photos. The dogs are black and white and cute.

_PointMan2Rent (9:3__5 AM): I am NOT like that dog!11!1_

_Mr8AndHalfInches (9:3__5 AM): relax, darling. u see? I made you angry from Europe:D. U like that, eh?_

Arthur sighs.

_PointMan2Rent (9:3__5 AM): if you say so, mr. eames._

_Mr8AndHalfInches (9:3__5 AM): you listening music?_

_PointMan2Rent (9:3__5 AM): Mozart's. _

_Mr8AndHalfInches (9:3__5 AM): phew, I knew it. find "Sour Cherry" on YT. _

He opens Mozilla and visits YouTube. He founds the video and opens it. It's indie rock or something. He listens to the song.

_PointMan2Rent (9:3__7 AM): it's okay _he writes when the song ends. _but I prefer classical stuff. _

_Mr8AndHalfInches (9:3__7 AM): I KNOW, darling_

_PointMan2Rent (9:3__7 AM): why you call me so anyways?_

Arthur smiles slightly. He's wanted to ask this question so much.

_Mr8AndHalfInches (9:3__7 AM): you like me calling you 'darling'. I KNOW that._

_PointMan2Rent (9:3__7 AM): I don't. and you know nothing about me. _

_Mr8AndHalfInches (9:3__7 AM): you saying I'm not? you like latte and I'm 100% sure 'bout that. _

_PointMan2Rent (9:3__7 AM): almost everybody likes latte._

_Mr8AndHalfInches (9:3__7 AM): maybe. but I know how YOU like to have it. you always start from the foam and you lick it from a spoon. taking some foam and licking. slowly, carefully, to make the spoon clean again just by sucking it. _

Arthur glances at his coffee. The foam is gone. He has done what Eames said. Exactly the way he said.

_PointMan2Rent (9:3__7 AM): no _he lies.

_Mr8AndHalfInches (9:3__7 AM): yes _comes the answer. _;)_

He sips his latte. It's almost cold.

_Mr8AndHalfInches__ (9:38 AM): and I KNOW you like all sweet things. and chocolate. that's why you like latte so much. it's kinda like chocolate, with milk, can be very sweet, but it's still coffee. I know that you were quite chubby as a kid, darling._

Arthur puts a spoon into his mouth and starts to suck it absentmindedly.

_PointMan2Rent (9:3__8 AM): how do you know dat?_

_Mr8AndHalfInches (9:3__8 AM): I like to know sth 'bout ppl I'm working with:) BUT I think you r too skinny right now. ppl don't take you seriously enough, they ain't afraid of you but we both know you can be deathly dangerous. anyways, if you are by any chance in a cafeteria now, have sth sweet. a donut or sth with chocolate. _

_PointMan2Rent (9:3__8 AM): I don't fancy anything sweet nor with chocolate now _he lies and glances at pieces of cakes behind the glass on the bar.

_Mr8AndHalfInches (9:3__8 AM): c'mon, darling, for me. small sugar rush will be good for your mind. _

Arthur hesitates. The waitress comes and takes his empty glass.

"Um, sorry," he says and the girl smiles at him, "can I have a piece of chocolate cake? A small one?"

She nods. After a minute there is a cake next to Arthur's elbow. It's all chocolate: white, dark, milky and calories, fucking calories.

_PointMan2Rent (9:3__9 AM): you made me do this! it's a chocolate cake. _

_Mr8AndHalfInches (9:3__9 AM): enjoy;) tell me if it's good. _

Arthur takes a bite. It's sweet, tasty, good, so good. He licks his fingers and answers Eames:

_PointMan2Rent (9:__39 AM): goooood. _

_Mr8AndHalfInches (9:3__9 AM): I bet you have just licked your fingers. _

_PointMan2Rent (9:3__9 AM): I HAVE NOT! _he lies again blushing. _I used a tissue. you know what a tissue is, right?_

_Mr8AndHalfInches (9:3__9 AM): yea, right. Like I'm gonna believe u. _

_PointMan2Rent (9:3__9 AM): u should. we working together, remember? better trust me. I've saved your ass so many times. _

_Mr8AndHalfInches (9:3__9 AM): I've saved yours nice too. _

Arthur bites the cake again. And again licks his fingers discretely. They're sweet of chocolate.

_PointMan2Rent (9:3__9 AM): my nice ass?_

_Mr8AndHalfInches (9:3__9 AM): yes. it's nice but too small. I bet it looks terrible in jeans. _

_PointMan2Rent (9:3__9 AM): you're wrong. I'm wearing jeans right now and my ass looks OKAY. but we r not going to talk about my ass, eh? _

_Mr8AndHalfInches (9:40__ AM): you prefer taking 'bout my ass?:P_

_PointMan2Rent (9:__40 AM): N O. no arses, please. _

_Mr8AndHalfInches (9:__40 AM): as you wish, my dear. how's your project? _

Arthur must admit he's completely forgotten about the research for Cobb.

_PointMan2Rent (9:__40 AM): very well _he lies. _it's almost finished. _

_Mr8AndHalfInches (9:__40 AM): my lil' liar. you enjoy our conversation _comes quickly._ I can see the only thing you're working on at the moment are your answers to my questions. Nice skullcandies, anyways. classy, darling. Cobb won't believe me. _

_Mr8AndHalfInches __is offline._

Arthur reads Eames' words again. He can see? He lies! He's in Berlin. Or so he said. Arthur scouts around in panic.

And there he is. Eames comes smiling with an iMac under his arm.

"Hello, darling," he says sitting next to Arthur.

"Y-you liar!," the younger man stutters.

"Same to you, darling. And you have chocolate here." He touches Arthur's lower lip with his thumb. "I've missed you so much so I am here. Aren't you happy?"

"I. Am. Not," Arthur hisses every word separately, but he's laying.

"I know you, don't forget that so easily," Eames smirks. "Ask me a question about yourself and I shall answer. I have this folder, you know, on my hard drive, named 'Arthur'."

"I'm your hobby or what?"

"Nope, darling," he says still smiling and leans towards Arthur to whisper to his ear: "You're the only weakness I have."

Arthur blushes. He feels inside that Eames isn't laying now.

"Let's have some proper hot chocolate with whipped cream and cinnamon, shall we?"

Arthur clears his throat.

"And with caramel sauce," he adds smiling slightly.

"As you wish, darling."

THE END


End file.
